This is how I looked after the end of a zany bit of testing and answers yesterday.
Not only have I been dealing with some physical symptoms (arthritis in my back which is now in check, an improving heart arrythmia and some unusual others) but I have been battling fear at the same time.
Fear of not having enough. Partly financial, partly relational, which hugely needed God to intervene and set me free.
I am pleased to say that yesterday while going through two heart ultrasounds and a rigorous heart stress test – I had no fear. God helped me control my breathing (all those in and outs and hold its!) and gave me the strength I needed on the treadmill. Even though some in my family have had more serious heart issues, I had peace as I got my results.
The cardiologist has no idea why I have this arrythmia, and is sending me for a cardiac MRI to further investigate why. Still no fear, knowing God is with me.
And then a few hours later, my doctor gave me the results of a huge batch of blood work. One response which indicates something she suspects is going on in my body. Not a life ender, but something requiring me to take better care of myself on a daily basis. But as only one part of what should have been a two parter showed up, back I go for more testing and waiting.
But again, friend? No fear showed up. Instead a calm wave of thankfulness that God is on control, no matter what.
For me, the person who loves to schedule and plan, get it done on time, and works as hard as I rest when appropriate? The waiting and not knowing would normally eat me up inside.
Responding to fear with faith has made all the difference, friend.
Is it easy? No. Taking every thought and filtering it through my faith, fear or frivilous filters needs to be done immediately with intention.
But having a calmer mind and more hope filled heart is so worth the effort!
What has God been amazing you with as you give it over to Him?