honor on her

This week we will be visiting my hubby’s mom for mother’s day.

We speak fairly regularly by phone when we can, however in order to show her honor we don’t visit too often.

Here is a hard lesson I have learned about honor.

We can honor a person without honoring their choices.

My mother in law is a very broken woman.  I know without a doubt that she loves God. She is however very bound due to trauma in her past that has not been resolved. Many of the choices in life have not been ones I can honor.

However, God has given me the ability to move past the hurt she feels and wields as a weapon at times, and honor her as the daughter of the King she is.

Do you too struggle with loving someone who is not making wise choices?

I see the disciples struggling with this a bit in the gospels, and I love them all the more for it, because they represent us. The regular Joes & Joannas, whom Jesus came to walk beside, and show how to honor.

Jesus never once told a sinner it was okay they had sinned. He loved them where they were at, and pointed to a better way.

He honored them as people, while not liking their choices, the fall out of their sin.

I am now able to show honor as He leads me to my mother-in-law, because I too know that I don’t always make wise choices.

Yes God honored me by choosing me, in the midst of my sin.

Its time for us to extend grace and honor those He came to save. Seeing them as He does…the broken, hurting, lost who don’t know how much their Father loves them.

He bestowed the biggest honor on each and every one of us through the Cross.

He took on our failures, sins, bad choices so we could be free, and become part of His family.

What an honor.

If you too have a loved one you struggle to be around at times, remember God honored those who didn’t deserve it with His gift of Jesus.   You, and I included.

As His beloved, we need to extend that honor to all those around us.

There were moments when the disciples didn’t get it, and Jesus patiently would offer an explanation, and I am sure offer His Father prayers that they would understand at the right time!

He modeled showing honor to us all when He was with us on earth:

Love.
Grace.
Mercy.
Patience.
Forgiveness.
Honor.

(P.S. I am not suggesting you purposefully put yourself in front of any kind of firing gun, if a relationship is abusive.  In that case, you can best show honor through prayer, and seeking His direction.  Honor His request to pray for those who hurt you. for them to come to see Him and be transformed. Jesus didn’t intentionally seek out the Pharisees, but was prepared to answer them when they turned up.)

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live free

Did you know you are free?

You really are.

You are free to make any choice you want to.

You are.

No one can make you choose.

Our wills determine our choices.

If you are stuck in a bad habit, you may feel like you have no choice but to keep doing what you have been doing…but that is a lie.

We always have a choice.

God designed us to be free.

And God allows us to make our own choices, even when He knows they aren’t the wisest or how we will be hurt by them.

Why would such a loving God allow us to do so?

Because He wants us to freely choose His way, just as Jesus did.

Do you grasp that Jesus CHOSE the cross? He freely agreed to follow through, despite the devastating pain & separation from His Abba & Holy Spirit when He took on all our sin?

As we are made in His image, we too are designed to be free to choose. We are free to say yes, and likewise no.

This may seem childish and simplistic a concept to some of you, and I bless you in the level of freedom you are walking in.

Some of us are not that free yet.

I have the tendency to bottle my emotions when I am upset…and this shows up in eating past my hunger cues.

I have not always has this extra weight issue. There have been periods where I am healthier, and my appetite is based on real physical hunger desires, versus when I fall off the wagon and eat based on my emotional hungers not being addressed properly.

I am free to choose to eat well, or not. But my choice, either way, comes with consequences. Over eat? Overweight. Eat healthy? Healthier temple.

This is just one example of how we are free to choose.

We are free to say no to good things too, when we want to say yes to the best choice for us. I left a job I loved because God was calling me into a new direction. I was both free to follow, and free to stay. The choice to obey His call? Up to me.

Your choice in a single moment has future impact.

Choosing God, means your future will not end once we leave this earth, nor will it be the same while you live out the rest of your days.

Choosing Him of our free will invites Him to release the fullness of His freedom within us, stirring us up to answer its call.

Choosing His way means we allow Him to direct our path, as only He knows the way ahead, and if we are listening closely, we will avoid pitfalls and distractions along the path.

We are always free to agree, or not.

If there is an area of your life you want to bring into alignment with the freedom He has for us, ask Him to shine His light on it, and break you free from the unhealthy consequences you have been dealing with. Especially our mindsets, emotions & spirits.

For when we freely agree with something that isn’t healthy for us, we are impacted by those choices.

You may think or feel unhealthily, such as hearing ‘You’ll always be so pudgy’ randomly run through your mind or feeling yucky when you catch a glimpse of yourself in the mirror, while trying on clothes.

Your spirit may be wrestling to break free from the chains of your choices as well, for it knows when we choose well or badly, for it is eternal and always trying to commune with its Creator.

Here are a few tips to help us stay free to make the best choices:

1. If you know you are bound by a bad choice, you are free to run to your Abba and ask Him to break the chains binding you. Always.

2. If you have a bad mindset about yourself (stupid, lazy, ugly…) ask your Abba to remind you who you are to Him. Write down what He tells you. Read it over every time an old name pops up. Choose to be free from the negative mindset of your past.

3. If your emotions are driving your decisions, its time to ask God to move into the driver’s seat, and filter all your decisions through His love and best for you. You are always free to put God on the throne of your life.

4. If you know you need help to break free to be the you He designed, run for it. Don’t hesitate. Today could be the day you are set free! You are always free to ask for help, for we were meant to be in community. To seek support when we need it, to offer help when others need what only we can give.

5. Remember you are free to choose in every decision you make. You are always free to ask God His opinion, and free to choose to wait for His response.

These past seven days, I have been working through this freedom especially in regards to my eating, which is really about my emotions. I believe I am free to eat whatever I want whenever I am hungry. I am also free to say no when I am not, and to stop when I am full. I am very thankful to Beth Kinder & Sandi Krakowski for their wise Spirit led input into stepping fully into the freedom God has waiting for me as I freely choose His way, every day!

I am free not to live for anyone else but You! Help me walk that out each and every today I have with You, Lord.

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consequence free

There is a catchy song by Great Big Sea with these lines in the chorus: “I wanna be consequence free, I wanna be where nothing needs to matter.”

The truth is: Life Matters.

And there are consequences for our actions, good and bad.

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When you are headed for a fall, wouldn’t you like to hear to turn away or stop moving in that direction?

You can, in case you didn’t know.

God has given us His Spirit to guide and direct us. He is for us, which means He wants better for us than we do, and He loves us immeasurably more than we will ever love ourselves.

We need to be listening.

I don’t know about your but there are tines I am so caught up in what I am doing that it would take a bulldozer coming at me full throttle to grab my attention.

Or so I thought.

I have been realizing that the small voice prompting me within is His voice, and I am trying to make sure I am tuned in to His frequency.

You see, I want to be negative consequence free.

I want to say I am sorry and change my ways so I never make that mistake again.

I want to care for others the way I want to be cared for.

I want to become the best me I was designed to be.

But I can’t do it alone.

I have four people holding me accountable for a healthy change in my life, which starts today.

I felt the whisper remind me that we were not meant to be alone.

Strength comes out of our weakness through faith & being part of a loving community.

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One that will tell you to turn away from the path you are on, coz you aren’t going to like where you are headed, before you fall.

A community that loves up on you, encourages you to face your fears, forgive your wounders, press in to God for all your needs.

Life matters, and so do the consequences of your choices.

Decide today to make choices to bless you, not hurt you in the long run.

Your life will thank you for it!