lining up where I shouldn’t

Don’t compare yourself to others. Compare yourself only to the person you were yesterday. @toddclark

The comparison trap will cause me to believe what I see, and forget what I know. Beth Kinder

I have a problem with my mirror. Maybe you can relate.

My mirror doesn’t show just my reflection, but lines me up beside others I compare myself to, every time i approach it.

In fact, I can’t remember a time besides my wedding day, that i looked in the mirror and just saw me.

Until yesterday.

I decided after having some fun with matching my red undertones for an all over foxy red these past eight months to head back to my roots.  Which are a dirty blonde with i suspect a few streaks of grey.  I am trying to simplify my life, and fussing with hair dye every time my roots show is too high maintenance for me (but that is me, if you can do it, bless you!)

After my daughter helped get all the dye on, i realized that as I was looking in the mirror, I was wondering what people would think if the grey starts coming in as I let my hair go natural.

Then i thought of a few women i know who always have perfect coiffed hair, as my nana would say.  Without a hair out of place.

And as my mind began to wander down that path, this time i caught myself, as i reminded myself of a quote that came to mind:

Not my circus, not my monkeys.

I don’t need to worry or compare myself to others, because let’s face it, everybody is struggling with something.  Just because it can’t be seen on the outside, doesn’t mean it isn’t there on the inside.

I am tired of judging myself by people’s standards, and lining their opinions up beside me in the mirror.

I choose His standard for me, which is Jesus.

I choose His design for me, which is unique.

I matter to Him, because of His timely & costly investment in me.

I don’t have to compare myself to anyone, but rather I choose listen to His heart for me, which is to live free & close to Him.  I choose to change the things He is most concerned about uprooting from me, and embrace the newness He has waiting for me.

Quite frankly, my hair color, or my extra weight, or my freckles, or my naked nails are between God & me.

Stop allowing the enemy to invite other people into the conversation God wants to have with you alone.

It was quite a jolt to my mind to realize where my thoughts naturally start to wander.

And they wandered back to a particularly hurtful grade 7 classmate, who embarrassed me in front of the whole class through her writing about me. Which I believed has been fully dealt with, not!

God reminded me today that the reason there was still an entry point for the enemy was due to my harboring unforgiveness, and shared with me that the person wasn’t trying to be deliberately cruel as it came across, but was very insecure & jealous and was trying to knock me out of competition for our mutual friend’s affection.

By my not forgiving her as a person, but just the action, I allowed a piece of the root to remain, and the enemy has been nurturing it to grow down deep over the years.

I am so done with that!

So i pray,

“God, I fully and completely forgive S___________. I believe Your blood is more than enough to forgive all my sins, and I extend the same mercy to her that You extended to me. Full & utter forgiveness in Jesus’ mighty name.  Wherever she is, I ask You to release Your Spirit to whisper the truths You long for her to hear into her mind, heart & spirit.  I ask You to restore to me the joy I had in being myself, in embracing who You designed & called me to be.  Uproot the enemy plant You have just destroyed, and release a fresh sense of Your wholeness and peace where it used to live.  May I ever delight in hearing Your words spoken over me. May I ever trust in You as the Lover of my Soul.  May i never lose the wonder of knowing how much YOU delight in ME. May I continually bring the things which are breaking me down & place them into Your hands for You to build me up. Where the enemy played for harm, restore Your goodness & purpose in my life.  Blessed be the Lord!  I pray this as one of Your beloved, Abba.  In Jesus’ name, and Holy Spirit power. Amen.”

Instead of letting ourselves see just our outer beauty, let’s join God in seeing His hand & move in our lives.  As children of the King, as the beloved bride of God, let’s allow the Lion of Judah to arise within, and move forward in the confidence of who we really are.


No matter what we look like its who we are inside that truly counts.

His handiwork.

His child.

His delight,

His beloved.



One of the downsides to working part time is missing out on the same camaraderie those who work full time share.

The same can be said about our walk with God.

God isn’t interested in part time relationship.

He is ours full time, 24/7, 365.

And beyond.

We think of time in forward increments, God sees all time at any time.

He is, after all, eternal.

When I keep too busy with life, I tend to waver on knowing where I belong.

God is always there to remind me I belong to Him.

He belongs to me.

Nor because of anything I have done, will or can do…
but because I am the only me He made.

That alone makes me, and you, precious to our Creator.

But He didn’t end there.

When we kept wandering, as the distracted tend to do, away from Him, and failed to focus on the words He kept speaking to us through His Word & prophets…
He sent the Word.

To live among us.
To walk beside us.
To listen to our hurts.
To heal our brokenness.
To love away our loneliness.
To touch us- heart, mind, soul & body.
To set us free through the death we deserved.

To know, without doubt, we belong.

We are His.

He bought us at great price, and will never stop calling out to us to come: be known by Him, and know Him.

When we spend a great deal of time with others, we develop a sense of belonging: that we fit, we are good together, which only makes us want to spend even more time together.

We become tightknit, close than we sometimes could ever dream possible.

We know that we know we belong.

If you struggle with knowing where you belong, look no further than His Word, His heart poured out in a love letter like no other.

God reminds us each and every day that we have a place where we belong.

With Him.

God reminds us each moment that we are treasures.

To Him.

God draws us close in His embrace, so we can rest.

In Him.

The belonging you long for?
It is a precious gift,
by Him.

May you draw closer to His Presence than you can imagine, as He reminds you how much you belong to Him, always.



God is patient transfiguring all the notes of my life into the song of His Son. – Ann Voskamp

As His child, my life has a purpose beyond the ordinary.

I don’t state that to claim I am special, as each and every one of the people who ever have, do or will walk the earth has the same possibilty- a purpose prepared just for them by God.

The same God who is waiting to take their/our ordinaryness and make it/us extraordinary.

Because of what He will do through and in us.
Not just because He made us, but because He wants to keep making us into our best us.

When we surrender our all to God, to Jesus, He begins to whispers His plan for our bring made new to us.

Ultimately, we are the clay, waiting on the shelf or wheel to be spun at exactly the Potter has planned:

For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.

-Eph 2:10 ESV

The next time you are having s particularly bad day, remember to keep your eyes on Jesus and the fact that God isn’t finished with us yet!

He is patiently waiting. 😉
To make something even more beautiful than we can imagine!!

alone or lonely?

Which do you feel more like:

Alone is the absence of people,
while lonely is the absence of connection. – Camerin Courtney

I have learned, the hard way, to listen to my mood within when I am on my own, and how to discern which I am feeling in a solo moment.

It is harder to feel alone in a crowd, but very lonely? Quite common.

It is easy to feel alone and lonely when you are skipped over in a group, or ignored in conversation, especially with strangers in close corners.

alone is a state of being
lonely is a mindset

alone can sometimes be fixed simply by being with other people, where loneliness can be harder to cope with

There are two truths I use to combat when I feel lonely, or all alone:

Deuteronomy 31:6
God will never leave me or forsake me.

With Him, I am never alone.

As a child whose birth father decided family life was not for him, then unexpectedly passed away when I turned three, abandonment & feeling unwanted was an identity I wore for far too long.

The verse above helped me wear a confidence I now have for eternity… I am never ever ever going to be alone.

I am FEEL alone at times,but that verse reminds me of the truth-
I AM never alone, forevermore.

But how do you handle feeling overwhelmed with loneliness?

Do I struggle with this?
Oh yes, too often it seems.
Starting a new job, switching churches, moving to a new neighborhood…
I don’t handle transitions very well at first, on the inside.

In fact, I still struggle with this one more than feeling alone, and recently God reminded me of one of my other lesser known fave verses in His Word…

Psalm 68:6
6A God sets the lonely in families…

And I was instantly reminded of how He answered the prayer of my heart from a very young age… my deep desire for sisters.

I now have the best sisters any girl could ask for.

They are truly additions to my family.

I believe Jesus found the same connection with His disciples.

My sisters help me make it through some days by:
encouraging me to keep moving my hubby & kids & parents,
keep challenging myself at work,
cheer me on when I sing or write,
and love up on me when I need it.

When you laugh, cry,
support & help one another in
both the best & the hard times,
break bread, eat Thai, drink Chair,
share a love of books, music,
and gratitude for all we do have
you become family.

Being adopted by God though Jesus into God’s forever family
has dramatically lessened my core loneliness when I keep it in mind.

I try to use the Word to help me let go of what I want to and replace it with what I need to:

Inviting His Presence into all my nows.

Welcoming His love through those He chosen to show me love.


Its time to #WordUp & keep the Word close at hand, letting God fill the gaps & strengthening us as we walk out His truth.

We are never alone when we are His child.

He shows me His love through those who love me.