when you are the owner of a broken heart

Friend, today I am going to share from the heart one of the biggest lessons I have ever learned about brokenness.  My prayer is that the same God who is rebuilding the broken pieces with me will give you a glimpse of hope where you are feeling broken.

Maybe you and I, we’re never meant to be complete. Could we just be broken together? If you can bring your shattered dreams and I’ll bring mine. Could healing still be spoken and save us? The only way we’ll last forever is broken together. – Broken Together- Casting Crowns

Relationships are hard.

Especially the ones with the people you interact with every day.

Because in our own way, deep down within each of us, we are broken.

Some more than others, but no one walks this earth unscathed in some way.

Not even Jesus did.

I have found that when I am feeling broken, I have a tendency to hide away, lick my wounds and brood. Occasionally, a full blown cry fest erupts, leaving me exhausted on top of the broken pieces I am trying so hard to hold together.

But we were designed for community. With our best friends and families, but especially in marriage, if we have been blessed with that gift.

These past 25 years together, my hubby and I have had a lot of mileage into the realm of brokenness. It has been harder than I imagined at times, more painful than I ever thought, and gone deeper than I ever dreamed possible.

Yet together we are stronger because of it, for we can see God moving better in each other at times than we can sense Him moving within ourselves.

Building one another up when the other is feeling low. Being the shoulder to cry on when we need to let it out.

Because the secret to being broken in a marriage and still staying married?

The three stranded cord.

By yourself you’re unprotected. With a friend you can face the worst. Can you round up a third? A three-stranded rope isn’t easily snapped.  Ecclesiastes 4:12 (MSG)

When even one of you invite God into your marriage, He intertwines Himself into it. He becomes the stabilizer, the marriage counselor. He gives you the love to express when you feel empty, yet your hubby needs to know you care. He gives your hubby the strength to just listen & tell you he loves you.

Without God, our marriage would not have made it this far.

Because in our own strength we would have run on empty long ago.

It’s not about having made a bad pick, or being a mismatched pair.

It’s making the one you are with your mate, supported by the Love that never fails, never gives up and never runs out on either of you, or your marriage.

If you know you are broken and need help, pray and ask God to bring you to the right resources, or bring the best help to you.

Your spouse’s brokenness isn’t for you to heal, that is His job. They need your support and love as they face their own brokenness and support you in yours.

God knew when He designed marriage that we would need one another:

In better, in worse.
In sickness, in health.
With wealth, without much.
Whether whole or broken.

The amazing thing I have found? My hubby and I have not been so broken in the same ways that we couldn’t be there for one another. Often not perfectly, but present none the less.

In His mercy, He makes us the mate our spouse needs. Whether we have broken bits or not.

Only God can take what is broken, and shape it to make something beautiful.

  • He is with us, every step of the journey.
  • His Presence draws closer with every request for Him to come and be nearer.
  • His love, strength, grace and mercy are more than enough for what you and your spouse may face today.

He longs to restore and repair where we are broken, and can do amazing things when we place ourselves in His hands.

Broken together with the Potter makes for a beautiful finish beyond belief.

When we give Him all the pieces, He can make us whole again, one piece at a time.

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#broken #hopefortheharddays #hopeinHisPresence

live life in community

For many years, I have felt on the outside looking in… maybe you too can relate.

There have been seasons where I was missing having close sisters. That feeling where you long for family beyond the blessings you already have, Where my heart felt lonely despite a loving hubby, great kids, friends & family.

Heart sisters.

And I remember one day praying to Him, and ripping this longing from my heart & offering it to Him.

We were never meant to walk alone.

We are designed for community.

Community for me means walking along side those who share your passion & calling, who will give you a hand up on the hard days, and encourage you to unfurl the dreams yet to fly deep within.

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We were meant to live life in community, just as our Father, Jesus and Holy Spirit do!

There are three elements of community which God has been revealing to me of late.

1. Come.

If you don’t show up, it isn’t community. Community gathers regardless of feelings, because it knows we are better together than on our own. Where we answer the invitation God offers to us all, to come and be. Be fully present, as you are.

2. Commune.

Also known as family. Living real lives together. Accepting us each as works in progress, on a journey towards wholeness:

  • Encouraging one another as we need it
  • Reminding one another to draw closer to Him and our loved ones
  • Giving our best at all times
  • Using our gifts for His glory
  • Praying over & for each other when needs arise
  • Being helping hands when we can meet another’s need
  • Crying together, sharing our brokenness
  • Offering one another a safe place to rest and be refreshed when we are weary

3. Unity.

When we gather with common purpose, somehow our unity makes us stronger, and greater than when we stand alone. I believe this is the secret to how God is which we gloss over in its complexity: God is three, yet one. Each fully their own person, yet united as One.

In community, we become the one He intended us to be.

Will community always be amazing? Nope. There will be hard times when our individuality rears its voice and cries out for attention, when we allow our unhealed places & pain to speak first.

Is community worth it? Always. There will be blessings you cannot yet imagine when we press in and dig deep together.

For me, community involves sisterhood. I have been so blessed with several heart sisters to live daily life with in the community I live in, here in Ontario. I don’t want to imagine life without them. They bless me more than they know.

But there was still an empty space left in my heart, a longing for more which was yet to come…which I believe we all have deep within.

God led our family to a new home church, and once we worked through our grief of missing where we had been, we found ourselves enveloped in the community He planned for us. Our family, as both a unit & individually, is the stronger & healthier because of it. Our church is intentional about loving God and loving people, and becoming family. Family is always welcome, warts and all.

He led me to Remade, and Beth Kinder. Beth & I connected, and before I knew it, I had the close sisters my heart had been longing for through their online community. Crossing country borders, denomination, age, race & status. Ministering, laughing, crying, writing, equipping, challenging, living life together despite the mileage that separates us. And that last longing was put to rest when I was welcomed in, and asked to join this community. Although Remade has morphed into a new season, I am still heart connected with the lovely sisters I met through that time of ministering together.

As I have followed His leading, He has blessed me with new friendships, and reawakened a few dreams through growing deeper in the communities He is planting me in.

Covid led to me putting a few former learned skill back into action, as I began to lead an online women’s Facebook group, helping sisters stay & feel connected despite lockdowns, through worship, bible study, prayer and sharing both the laughter & tears as we get to know each other.

God can unite us beyond our expectations when we follow His lead.

Community is His idea, the expression of how He lives life together as three in one.

Come, commune with Him & become one. This is the core of community, connected & grounded to God first.

Ask Him to draw you closer to the community He has for you here on earth.

Your best ‘you’ comes to life in the community where He waits to make it possible.

If you are intrigued by the concept of an online community, ask God to lead you to the One He has for you. Feel free to visit my connect page for ways to connect with my online community, for there is always room for one more!

If you too live in Canada, and long to meet with other Christians in the larger church community, Gather Women is crossing Canada and meeting provincially.

If you too have been lonely for the deeper authenticity and support of community, don’t allow your lack to drive you. Invite Holy Spirit to open your eyes to where He wants you to gather, connect and live in community.

One

We are made One in Him.
He takes us from every background imaginable and make us His sons and daughters,  all of us.

We become His family.

One family.

And as family, we are meant to gather together as we pursue Him, the focus of our passion.

United.

One pursuit.
One passion.
One purpose.

To know Him more.
Become more His.
To share the good news that we are never alone.

It only took One to bring us back from the outskirts and plant us firmly in the circle of His affection.

Jesus.

One love.
Which spanned the heights of heavens and the depths of despair to free us from the enemy of the One. 

Release the snares of our wrongdoings,  and ushers us into His embrace and family.

One things alone remains forever.

His love for you and I.

Wavering because you don’t yet know what he has called you to do?

Your purpose is clear.
Pursue Him.

Our primary purpose for being on this earth is to know our Maker, and be known by Him:
To worship Him for who He is.
To wonder at what He has done.
To walk where he leads.
To welcome Home the lost.
To work for His glory….
To let His Words come to live within us.
To listen as He speaks.
To love that He loves.
To never lack in companionship.
To learn at His feet.
To laugh at the wonders He displays.

Join me as together we celebrate the One, and become the Beloved He is creating for himself.

One bride, longing for her Love.
Pursuing Him with all she is and has.

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clinging tightly

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When my children were babies & toddlers, they used to cling tightly to me when we were in new situations or meeting new people.
As a mum, I adored those pressing in close snuggly opportunities which helped build their trust as they learned they could count of me to protect them.

As a little girl, my world shifted suddenly with the early death of my father and need for my mother to head to work full time. I felt unanchored, a feeling which stayed with me for more than a decade until I encountered God, and everything shifted once again.

Before Him, I tried clinging to my friends, boyfriends, my wit & sarcasm, music, reading & writing…..but all fell short of meeting the deeply rooted need for security which was begging to be watered as only God can.

Because clinging to anything but Him leaves us empty handed instead of tightly held.

We were made to be “cling ons” to Hope. Not the kind of window clings which unattach themselves as the elements change, nor the kind of Klingons who wreak havoc wherever they go.

We are meant to cling tightly to the One we were always meant to be rooted in.

The Only One who is our Rock solid security.

Whose foundation will never fail, whose embrace will always reek of grace & mercy, whose love for you & me is never ending, forevermore!

I am no longer ashamed about picturing myself clinging to His feet, pouring my heart out in worship, adoration & petition.

I am not ashamed of needing my hand held, despite being well into adulthood.

I know how desperately I need to be lead, fed, cared for & protected as I go through each day.

And I intend to cling on to Him, my Life Giver, for dear life as I move through the moments of each day.

The best parts of increasingly clinging on to Him?

He delights in holding on to us too! And He will never let us go.

Community revisited

Originally posted last spring for my church’s blog, however with the upcoming online Remade Community group kicking off this Monday, I have been revisiting what He has been teaching me about unity, and community. May you too be blessed by seeking greater unity with Him, and entering into deeper community with the Body.

Like the anticipation of the arrival of spring, the Word has been moving, stirring and growing deeper within me in a few areas as of late, but especially His desire for unity.

How good and pleasant it is when God’s people live together in unity!  Psalm 133:1

God is blessed when we live in community.  Even that very word includes both the requirements for healthy community: “come” into “unity.”  When we unite, God releases a blessing upon us as we come together to seek Him in community, for He draws near.

Community isn’t always pretty, but it is His design for us.  I have learned the hard way that sometimes we wound one another, hold back forgiveness or gossip…because we take our eyes off of the One who binds us together, and forget to love another as He has loved us. No holds barred, with no grievances between us:

Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. Colossians 3:13-14

When we show love to one another as Jesus did for us, while we listen for His leading, we find the differences between us start to mellow into the background, to fade behind His love as the melody uniting us together:

Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as family, be compassionate and humble. 1 Peter 3:8

Living in harmony doesn’t mean we always agree, because we are all uniquely wired and gifted, but it means family is more importance than our differences. We work it out with His help, because He desires it:

Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.Ephesians 4:3

As a community, we honor God when we pull together as one. For the One who died for us all is our unifying factor, the commonality which is the basis for our community as a body of believers. When we all use our gifts for His glory, not our own, our unity becomes apparent to those around us. The community at large takes notice when His people live and work together in unity. When peace abounds instead of division and turmoil.  Where we willingly submit to one another out of love, placing the needs of the body above our own.  When we confess to one another our offences and flaws, and find forgiveness, true rest for our souls.

This world is screaming out self-satisfaction, for life to be all about ‘me.’ When we gather in unity to worship God, following His way and not our own, His peace can be sensed in our communities.  Not only in each of us as individuals, but in our collective focus on Him.  As our prayers arise to Him, asking for Him to make us one, He releases a fresh wind of His presence, and community.

May God continue to bind us together, into the One heart at the core of the body, His.

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one

There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is no male and female, for you are all ONE in Christ Jesus. Galatians 3:28 ESV

When I hear about people putting losses down by categories, my blood boils.

When your loved one leaves you, has cancer, or is shot while at the movies, school or church, it shouldn’t matter what social class you belong to nor the colour of your skin.

We all bleed the same when we are hurt.

For we all made by the same Maker, in His image.

We were meant to be one family, united in God.

Not broken into factions and splinters, so diverse we can no longer move past our preferences in approach to unite around Him.

Personally, I don’t care how you choose to worship God.  It matters that you do it, and know Him intimately.  Who am i to tell you not to listen to that worship group or Pastor, and likewise?

Holy Spirit is to be the One voice we listen to, discerning His heart and path for us. One voice, rising above the pain and hurts on this earth.

For did you know, God’s heart breaks as He cries over the broken?

Not just for each individual, but everyone.

The whole Bride was the prize for which Jesus went to the cross. God’s whole heart on display for us all.

For He knows we are all meant to be One in Him, because He designed us with that need.

When one of us is hurting, we all hurt when we are united in Christ.

The attack in Charleston has not only slaughtered the innocent, but attempted to breach the Kingdom.

May we rise as One church, One bride under our One Head, Jesus and lift our voices in prayer, inviting God to minister to the families left empty armed, and this local church which has been invaded.

May our prayers, those of the One family of God, regardless of colour, race, status, education or stature, arise like incense to His throne.

May He respond with a pouring out of love & unity on His Beloved unseen before, right here and right now.

May the Church respond with such unity His heart will be blessed.

One Bride, shining as she walks ever closer towards her Bridegroom.

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there can only be One

There can only be One.

We may think that there are more, we may even deceive ourselves that we are it.

But what the world screams the loudest is usually fueled by the enemy, the one who tries to counterfeit the Original, isn’t it?

At the center of humanity’s inability to get along is the lie that we know best. That we are capable of knowing what is best for other people, how they should live, whether they should have a certain job or not, whether they should be a part of the in group or left to the outskirts.

In these ways, and so many more, we judge one another.

But not only do we judge one another on what we think is best for each other, we judge them on what they have done wrong, as if we have never failed or sinned ourselves.

Humanity was never designed to be its own judge.

That role belongs to the Only One who is capable of administering it.

The Only One who has not fallen or sinned or made an error of any kind.

The Only One who was, and is, and ever will be the best for that position.

The Only One who is perfectly suited to judge, because He is perfect.

And He created the system of right and wrong, simply through being Himself.

Not only is He perfect, He is loving, kind, merciful…and eternal.

He is beyond time, this Judge, and so is not swayed by the urgency we have to resolved things in the here and right now.

He is also patient, and with the best purpose behind being so…

God does not want any to perish, and as such, has postponed His judgment until Jesus returns, because Jesus paid the price which allows God to pass over us until that time to come arrives.

When we try to judge one another, we hurt Him.

When we refuse to forgive, and lay down our offenses, we hurt ourselves, the Ones He loves, and muddle up our relationships with those He loves.

And when we judge, withhold forgiveness and hurt those around us?

We join Pilate on the Judgment seat.

We were never meant to judge one another.  God allowed the Israelites to have kings, and governments, full well knowing that it would entangle humanity  into the judgment debate…where before it had only been God’s way, with God as judge.  He knew the enemy wanted this, to turn us against one another.

But God wasn’t surprised, not unprepared for the cost to come to restore proper balance.

Here’s the clincher.

There is Only One judge.

God.

I am not talking about someone judging your work to be substandard because you didn’t put in your best effort kind of judgment here.

I am talking judging over those He created, judging their hearts, their decisions and motives.

Just as Jet Li had to battle his evil duplicate in the classic sci-fi movie “The One”, we have to wrestle down the enemy duplicate of who we are meant to be.

God made each of us uniquely,. and we reflect Him in our only One-ness.

It is time to kick the fake you image the enemy is prompting your flesh to put on back to the pit where it was made for.

In order to  be His hands to the world, our focus is to leave His fingerprints behind, no one else’s.

That means when you are tempted to judge someone over their situation, you ask God how to pray and love up on them instead.

This means we take a good hard long look in the mirrored windows of our own homes before throwing stones at the glass houses of others.

It means we deal with our hearts, decisions and motives on our knees before the Only One qualified to judge us, versus placing blame and deflecting through our judgment.

I soooo get this isn’t a nice soft word today…the mirror in front of me is screaming for me to get clean again.

I am so thankful I can ask Jesus to clean me and make me anew every evening, and every morning, because of what He did for us all on the cross, because He alone has the power to resurrect the dead & restore the broken, and Only he was ever meant to judge us.

I am so thankful His grip will not let go of me, until less of me and more of He is what the world will see.

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interwoven

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I love reading how God is moving in the lives of others.

I never stopped, until I saw the picture above, to put it all together.

We have interwoven lives.

Not just those of us who know each other.

Not just those who read your books, blogs, tweets or Facebook posts.

Not just those we encounter but never really get to know, the strangers on the bus, train, in your favorite cafe.

We are interwoven because God is the true main character of each of our stories.

Easter reveals to us that God entered each of our timelines, our history, present and future, and turned it all onto its head.

Less of me, more of You.

When God begins to write our stories, line by line, scene by scene, chapter by chapter, we begin to see just how interwoven our lives truly are.

If He is with us and in us and strengthening us, it is his story too.

And if He is in everyone’s stories, than our stories must be interwoven into His story, all of HiStory.

All of history is His Story.

We are blessed to be grafted into His story, allowing Him to shape it for His maximum glory and our maximum benefit, becoming the most us we can become with His help.

His Story, history is really about how His love has called out to all the generations.

He is wanting not only our stories to reflect HiStory, but our hearts too.

His Story was led by love.

Will you allow HiStory to interweave with your heart?

Like the strings of twinkle lights we love to display every winter or holiday, will you allow yourself to be so intertwined with His heart that the seam connecting you together will be hard to detect?

one song

Today at church, we had a time of prayer for the communities where we live, as represented by those in attendance.

We made a stand, lifting our prayers and hands before God, offering all we have and all we are to Him.

During that prayer time, I started singing part of a new song over and over, and managed to jot down a few of the lyrics.

I haven’t been stirred to do so for a long long time.

It was like coming home.

Which is aptly so considering the lyrics I was singing!

We stand in the gap
For those He loves around us
Feeling God’s heart
For the ones He’s drawing in

Releasing freedom, freedom
to the captives crying
freedom is beckoning in.

We see freedom, freedom
For the sick and lonely
Freedom is calling them whole

We’re bringing freedom, freedom
For the hurt and broken
Freedom is loving them home

When we sense how God feels about one another, we begin to yearn for His plans to unfold.

Plans not to harm, but to bless.
Plans to heal.
Rebuild.
Grow.
Be made whole.
Plans that give us enduring hope.
Fulfilled promises.
Love everlasting.
A forever home.

May God awaken your gifts to bless those He has placed around you.

It takes one to love one.
One act of kindness.
One word of hope.
One hand of mercy.
One gesture of grace.
One listening to God’s voice.
One obeying their call.

Be the one you were designed to me.

There is only and ever will be only one of you.

Be the one you are to the fullest.