Tag: wait

waiting for Hope

Karla Lees

In the hard times, I have begun to speak words of hope to myself, especially when i want to wallow in my situation.

Life can be hard, can’t it?  And we can easily become swamped down by the what ifs, why mes, will it ever ends and Argggghhhhs.

I especially love the Psalms, because I can see myself in most of them.  Crying out to God in the midst of my anguish and pain.

But that’s only part of the purpose for the Psalms, Beloved.

The psalms were not penned to remind us we are alike in our difficulties in life, but to remind us of the Hope each psalm contains for us all.

Hope Himself will rise to meet us, as God met each psalmist in their journey of waiting and seeking.

Our living Hope is entrenched in each word of HiStory, the Bible; for He is  both the inspiration for every word and the rescue for each person recorded in its history.

And because He is, and always will be, He is our Living Hope in our present moments, no matter what they are.

He rejoices with us when we get or hear good news.

He cries with us when our hearts break from sudden or slow loss.

He mourns with us in our grief.

He actively pursues us when we feel lonely.

He houses us when the echoes of abandonment try to return.

He makes His home with us, giving us hope, purpose and a future intertwined with his heart.

So like the psalmist of Psalm 119, I choose to wait for His word of Hope.

For Him to speak life into my weary brittle bones. To spark passion into the embers of my dry heart. To come to me and show Himself strong. To love up on me in every area where I have lack. To provide over and above what I can believe for in the natural.

So I wait for You.

Because You have never failed to reveal Yourself to expectant hearts who eagerly wait for You.

Will you join me in the wait?

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when it’s hard to believe for the best

Karla Lees

Yesterday was a day filled with highs and lows, from which I am still both in shock and filled with praise as i process it all.

It is hard seeing your child reeling with hurt. One of mine is struggling to show honor in a placement where she has been discouraged and put down by the leadership for the past several weeks, simply because they are negative people.

The other child heard he may need surgery to fix a disc and nerve problem.

It has been hard to come alongside them and not take over, as the momma within rages at the circumstances.

Instead, I have stood and praised Him despite how I am feeling.

My children are not my babies anymore. They are both young adults who have had curve balls hurled their way, and are still standing up to praise Him in the midst.

If I have done nothing else right in the hard times of my life, seeing my kids raise Him in praise no matter the season blesses my heart for my part modeling how to do so.

But more importantly, it blesses His heart for their part in bringing Him the sacrifice of praise.

Last night, my country took a radical turn politically.  One that i sense will leave scars across every province. People who had served their constituents well were voted out because the nation decided to teach its former leader a lesson.

Experience can help guide us in the hard times, but faith in who you believe in needs to be our bedrock during the storms.

There is no one politician upon whose shoulders Canada can rest for safe haven in the coming storms.

There is only One pair of arms who can wrap around us and help us to stand, safe and secure in His embrace from what may come.

That became evident in a conversation with a coworker who had been reeling from an unexpected demand to prove himself again to a new team addition in another organization he works for, when he already has done so to the team as a whole for over a year.  His commitment to his word and the Word has been an inspiration to those who know Him, and inspired me to dig deeper into all He has for me. He cried out to God, spoke in response as He led, and God is stirring up the leadership to come out swinging in his defence.  As he waits, not yet knowing how this will all play out.

Yet He knows His security is not found in the support of human leaders, although he is blessed with their favor, but the King of Kings and Lord of Lords.

In the last 48 hours I have stepped up to the plate three times as God has called me to, and used my gifting in ways I wasn’t quite ready for.  I suspect that was so He could show me just how solid and dependable He could be for me as I solely put my Hope and trust in Him to strengthen and empower me for the tasks I stepped into.

He blew me away with His grace, and the knowledge He was with me. He showed up in power, and lives were blessed through the encounters with Him as a result.

Because I emptied myself of me all the more, He had more room to move through and in me to use me as a blessing where He had placed me.   It wasn’t easy to let go of my struggle to be in control, but it was so sweet to rest in Him and allow Him to lead.

In a hard place?

Wounded from an unexpected arrow in the battle?

Weary from the race?

Fearful of what lies ahead?

Find comfort in knowing you are never alone, Beloved.

Draw strength from His embrace.

Proclaim His praise even when things look dim and grey.

Rest in Him, as He keeps you by His side, and helps you to stand.

May He fill your heart to overflowing with His love, as you fix your eyes upon Him above the waves, and take hold of the Rock of Ages. He promises He will come to us, His Beloved, the ones He died to save from sin. He will not abandon us in the battle.  He will come to our rescue, and show Himself strong as our defence.

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when the wait seems so long

Karla Lees

God has been so good to me as I have been trying to figure out what He is birthing in me.

I have had all the cravings, restless nights and emotional mood swings hit in the past few weeks, as if I really was pregnant (nope, not!) as my spirit is trying to being the rest of me into this new alignment with His plans for me.

It is not a comfortable place to be, feeling like I am ready to give birth but my due date isn’t quite here yet.

Maybe you too can relate.

The tension between the now and the not yet can be agonizing at times.

The only way you can find peace in the wait is to agree with His timing, and wait.

Because getting frustrated over what might be is only putting fuel in the enemy’s hands instead of waiting for His Spirit to ignite what is to come.

I know He has good plans for me, His love for me is never failing and He adores me.

It can be hard as we wait to find out how and where we fit into the puzzle of what He is creating His Bride to be.

But we don’t wait alone.

I draw comfort from His Presence as I wait.

It doesn’t make the wait any shorter, but it makes it better as He and I wait together.

Because He gave all He had to get His Bride, I can trust He will be with me, and as I seek His design for my life, that where I best fit will be revealed.

What He wants for us to do will come to pass as we press in to Him, wait for His lead and step into the place He has waiting for us.

As we wait, He is stirring up the embers of His gifts which have been lying dormant within, just waiting to be born & breathe new life.

It will be worth the wait when we let Him lead us into place.

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getting it right

Karla Lees

Disciplined people can do the right thing at the right time in the right way for the right reason.

-John Ortberg

I have been disciplining myself to be listening & discerning more before I write or speak.

I want to be obedient, and not miss His timing for the moments in my life.

Today, I feel I am not to write, by to let the Word steep deep before putting fingers to keys.

I’ll be honest, I so want to dive into it right now, but i suspect there I something He wants me to discern before I do.

So I submit to the prompt of wait on my heart.

Because? Followers submit to their Leader’s direction, even when they don’t want to, for they know God wants them to.

Disciplined people accept discipline for the shaping tool it is, when their Maker is the one wielding the forge.

For Your timing,
for Your purpose,
in Your way,
I surrender
to Your lead,
and wait here
with You.

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better tomorrow today

Karla Lees

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I am a creative person, which can be a danger at times when I lose my anchoring.

Spending too long dreaming about the future can hobble your walk in the present.

We were meant to dream…but with the dreams God has for us to be dreaming. Dreams that awaken our soul’s deepest longings and desires, and single-mindedly pursue the passion they stir within us.

But the key is for God to be the one who gives us those dreams.
Which means we need to be pressing in close to Him regularly, and asking Him for the dreams He has meant for us to dream.

One of my deep down, never spoke about dreams in high school was to write a book.

I partly allowed the kind words of others to point me in a different direction for school and work, because I was too fearful to speak up and share my dream.

It took several years and a few major traumas for God to rekindle my love of writing into full flame again. When I had been in high school, computers were just coming into the mainstream, and I would never have believed I would end up writing a blog on my own computer every day!

I am trusting that the One who gave me this dream will stir up the embers until the spark catches on and it burns high with the fuel of my faith & His promises as it begins to unfurl.

How do i know this dream is from God, you may be asking yourself? I know I did.

1. I want to write because I have to. Its a part of me.

As God is the giver or our gifts & talents, I believe He hardwired to do so, and equips me to use it as He strengthens me. For God to give me a dream about writing fits with who He has designed me to be.

2. The dream never died.

God is eternal, and His words & promises are as well. What He has spoken comes to pass.

3. When you get confirmation.

When He reminds you through others who don’t know about your hopes & dreams, and they speak as if they are reading your secret journal, you can bet it was God! When He leads you to the right resources, a part of your spirit jumps and laughs within you.

I have another major dream He has spoken into me and over me over the past years. I am keeping that beautiful one even closer to my heart for its time has not yet come. So it is expectantly slumbering as I await for my Prince to awaken it.

Time spent pursuing Him will only add to the dreams He gives us, like colored paint adds depth and life to a black outline.

So I wait for the outline of my dream to write a book for His glory to unfurl. I have had a colored glimpse of what I think it will look like at the end, and am laying this dream down before its Giver so it will come to life as He leads.

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Dreams from God come true when we allow Him to take us by the hand as we sketch them out- whether its via word, music or art!

While I wait for what is to come, I draw close to Him today, to not miss out on what He has for me in the here and now.

My tomorrows are only in His hands if He has my today.

open arms await at the end of your journey home

Karla Lees

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The part of the Prodigal son story that really got me in the gut?

The fact the son knew the Father would take him back in.

Now, I know he missed exactly how much his father loved him under the weight of his shame, but he still knew he had a place with God.

So do you and I.

God gets that we will sometimes stray, wander & journey far. He intimately knows each of us, and as our Creator He knew this would be an lasting impact from the fall.

But He never stops waiting for us to come home.

Wherever your journey takes you today, He both waits and keeps watch over you.

His love is radiating out His eyes as He follows your steps.

His heart beats loudly as it yearns for your return.

He doesn’t have servanthood in store for you, but sonship.

He will restore the damages done as you wandered, pilgrim.

Wherever your feet may have strayed.

Come home.

its time to be still

Karla Lees

I was anything but still today.
What I got done today leaves me tired just thinking about it.

And as usual, a few unexpected raised their heads and tried to unravel the day.

My first reaction was to get ticked off. (Honesty before eloquence!)

My second was to confirm a correct response (as sometimes these are needed) with someone who knows about the situation.

My third was to cry out to God.

And once again, in my busyness I bungled up the order of how to deal with the unexpected.

Go to God first.
Pause.
Breathe.
Let it all out.
Wait.
Listen.
Do only if He leads you to.
If you don’t get clarification, that means to wait some more.
Repeat if necessary.

These past several days I am feeling more tired than normal. I am not sensing anything serious, just a need for some more self care and time off.

After getting home from my 12 hour work day, I sat on my comfy couch and popped onto Twitter to connect with a few feeds I am always blessed by reading.

Within five minutes, the following two verses and one quote had all grabbed hold of my heart.

I am listening, God.

My New What to Do When I Don’t Know What to Do List:

Bring it all to God:

Cast all your cares on Him, for He adores you. 1 Peter 5:7

Because:

God is always with us. He will never leave us. He’s always present in the place of need, the place of pain to provide comfort and hope. @jeremycamp tweet, Jan 12/2015 3:05pm

and because:

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In the middle of my longest work day, I needed to remember its okay to be be still.
To wait.
To catch my breath.
To listen.
To expect He is with me.
To recall how He loves me.
To claim the promise He has the best yet to come for me.
To let God battle for me where I am meant to let Him.
To remember tomorrow is a fresh slate ready for me to follow the right path when I don’t know what to do.

For tonight, I go to bed now knowing:

I slipped up.
I confessed.
He restores.
He adores.
His grace & mercy He pours
onto these uplifted hands.
🙂

#hopeinHisPresence

What three things to do when I need rest?

Karla Lees

I am not the Energizer bunny.
But I still try to keep going and going.

My batteries wear out, and need recharging.

Sometimes way earlier than I am aware of, and sometimes the energy completely drains until I collapse.

I am learning to listen to God daily about my day, so it doesn’t fill up just with what I want to do in it, but how He wants me to spend my time.

There are three things on the checklist I now follow to make sure I am getting enough rest.

1.Get honest.

If I am pooped, trying to ignore the early warning signs leads to more serious time off coming down the line. I am no use if I am completely out of commission, so acknowledging if I am getting weary is step one.

Tell people no when I have enough or too much on my plate as it is. I struggle with this one too as I don’t like to say no to work when part of my job is freelance, but my yes needs to be reserved for the best decisions, not all of them.

2. Get enough sleep.

This has become a hard one for me, as my husband’s snoring had become an issue, and driving my daughter to catch the first train on weekday mornings are leaving me more weary than usual as I struggle to find a new normal routine for getting things done and a healthy sleep pattern.  I now have to be in bed earlier than I want, so if it can wait until tomorrow, it may have to if I need sleep.  If I am off and feel tired during the day, I feel no guilt now in taking a nap.

3. Get enough rest.

This refers to my spirit. Taking time to read the Word, worship, walk & listen for His voice, wait & seek His Presence…this brings peace and quiet to me within, which is where I need it most. This is the part of me that needs rest the most. The part that depends on God 100%.

You can always bring peace with you when He lives in you, but you can’t always find it if you look to the world to provide it.

These three things help me find true rest for my soul, and re-energize my hope.

When I filter my day through them, I find I get more accomplished in a week than plugging away in exhaustion and survival mode.

What tips do you have to add more rest to your day?

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When how long becomes too long

Karla Lees

What do you do when your answer isn’t coming?

Because the loving God I know intimately has only the best for me…I know this deep deep within my soul. I believe His promises. I know His character never changes. He says He is for me, and He is all in, all the time.

So what do I do when after 31 years when an old adversary rears its head again, after being kept under control for the past few months?

When not only does it swiftly come back with a vengeance, but does so embarrassingly and very, very publicly?

I got mad.

So mad that the tears I wanted to cry didn’t have a chance to come out, as I am still mamma bearing over the continued bumbling over my daughter’s health situation.

I cleaned myself off as much as possible, and shifted from reaction mode into full tilt pursuit of God mode.

The enemy picked the wrong time and wrong person to piss off this time.

I prayed. Not long, or with many words, but:

“Enough, God. Shift the atmosphere around me to repel this attack, because if You are for me, this isn’t Your handiwork. I have had enough in my own strength. I need Your strength and endurance to help me through. Be my never failing hope, right here, right now.”

And I have a peace despite my stirred up emotions.

I know that I am in good hands.

I know He has plans for me to bless, prosper and lead me to a future beyond what I can imagine as I lie here now in discomfort and wearily type.

The same God I proclaimed and praised this morning at church, in the car this afternoon, and as I write this early evening….is with me.

He is more than enough for the worst the world can wrangle my way.  He continues to be there, helping me cope with the crisis, change as He calls, and cooperate with His Spirit as He lovingly leads me forward with care.

God is all in, always.

All in? As in all of Him is for me: when Jesus gave His all on the cross,
in whatever I am facing in this moment,
always, and forever.

In good times and through the bad, I am all in.

My hope is found in God.

Life, in its ups & downs, is temporary.

God is not.

I choose God to keep my focus and hope upon.

I only see things from my view point. God sees all things in all time. I can trust He is in control, even when I cannot see it.

And when a new situation suddenly shows up, sooner versus later, as one always seems to?

I will remind myself again that God is my true home. My refuge.
And I am safe in His embrace through it all, always.

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in the wait

Karla Lees

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Sometimes, all you can do in the wait is worship.

I am so thankful for my best friends today. I was awaiting some test results (i have some inflammation in some joints not going away) and instead of hiding myself away (my usual for things that concern me directly) I asked God to help keep my mind focused on something else instead.

Impromptu coffee with 3 girlfriends before my appointment helped, as did reading through the Psalms this morning.

Sometimes all you can do in the wait is worship….

I have several friends seeking answers and direction right now. We all tend to have a question or two we want God to answer, right?

Sometimes God says no because He doesn’t want us to go through that door, because He knows the damage we could encounter on the other side.

Sometimes God seems silent, because we really haven’t asked Him the real question on our hearts, because we are afraid He won’t love us anymore.

Sometimes God seems distant, because we withdraw inside ourselves from believing the blessings He has are really for us,  because if God really knew us, He wouldn’t want us any longer.

Sometimes God says yes, and confirms yes in a miraculous amazing way that dumbfounds us until we cannot contain the joy within any longer.

But sometimes God doesn’t appear to answer, because His answer is to wait. Not yet.

And its the not as clearly answered times, the feeling like we are in a drought, or on our own, where the secret to maintaining our hope becomes more evident.

It is in worshipping Him where we can rest in the waiting.

The laying it all down before Him, our hopes, dream, questions, wounds, hurts, brokenness, questions…. is an act of worship.

Giving our all to the One who deserves our attention 24/7, 365 days a year because of who He is, let alone what He has done for His people over the centuries, and what He will do into eternity.

Worship in the waiting opens our eyes to see who He really is, opens our ears to hear His quiet loving voice, opens our minds to sense His leading, and opens our hearts to receive His love.

Sometimes our waiting is designed to reach us, change us in a deeper fashion than a quick yes or straight no can.

Because sometimes we aren’t yet ready to hear the answer, let alone accept it.

When we draw near to God in worship, He equips us for what we need, right now, for what we are dealing with right now.

Sometimes His Presence is more than enough to help us through.

Today, God clearly demonstrated that although I had some test results come back, I need to wait until the next assessment coming up for more clarity.

And He has given me a peace beyond what I expected, as I keep my eyes fixed on Him on this path.

Whatever His timing, I choose to place my hope in knowing He has the best in store for me no matter what I see.

In a new way today, I found hope in His Presence.